All my life I have compromised. Given in. “Moulded my Beliefs” to fit in. Tried hard to be accepted.
Where do it get you? It makes you “Biege” and colourless. Completely lifeless and of course easily ignorable. It makes you a “Boring” nice person. I find it if you also don’t know what you stand for, it’s really easy to get manipulated and sucked into someone’s else’s plan (that is rarely for your own interests).
This has been a key revelation to me lately in that, why am I trying so hard to fit in? Why can’t I just be myself and let people either “Love Me” or “Hate Me”? I used to get really angry and then I started to look in the mirror.
I had some really messed up beliefs and views that said:
– Because I am not perfect,
– Because something is wrong with me,
– People have to like me,
– Because if they don’t,
It means I am wrong and bad.
Pretty “Positive Thinking” stuff huh? Great stuff to hear from a Business & Mindset Coach! Well it’s true. I am not going to BS anyone and pretend that I am the best thing “Since Kevin Rudd & Sliced Bread” as I have really had some hugely limiting stuff in my mind which have really stopped me getting my life on track. Many “Positive Thinkers” lie to us pretending they are larger than life!
It’s been funny lately, I have spoken to lots of clients and people – and believe it or not, this type of thing is a lot more common than I originally gave credit for. I used to blame myself and think something was “Wrong with me”, but there are so many of us out there which have been:
– Brainwashed by Bad People and Society into thinking as such – so we can be more easily controlled and manipulated.
I thought about it logically – this actually makes perfect sense if you want to control people (and I mean control in the typical “Autocratic” sense). If you suck everyone into thinking they are “inadequate” and there is “something wrong with them”, they are more likely to listen to the “So Called Experts” who really just want to control everyone for their own personal gain.
I once had this very Ex-Girlfriend. Now, before I write this section – please don’t think I am bagging her. It’s actually completely my fault as I chose to behave as I did. She used to have very Leftist Political Views (compared to my natural Centre-Right Pro-Liberal type of views) and I would let her views overtake mine because “My opinion didn’t matter” and there was “Something wrong with me”.
When I cleared this junk out of my head, my “Revelation” hit in that:
– Choosing to sit in the middle and have “No Opinion” is an opinion.
That is, my logic was “I need to keep everyone happy so they like me”. Well guess what! People don’t because your a push over and your weak and all that.
So if I just “Fly My Flag” and let people choose to Love or Hate me – this feels much better. At the very least I am being myself and not letting other people’s opinions control me! I am sick and tired of “Bad People” out there, that just want to control us and want us to keep our views to ourselves.
Speak Up I say! It will give these “Bad People” a run for their money.