I am sure it’s happened to many of you awesome people reading this article. You probably have been “Unfriended” on Facebook at some point.
It can certainly “Shock” ones emotions and bring up a lot of insecurities in oneself. I have had some great people Unfriend me on Facebook lately. I have had people who disagree with me on politics unfriend me, someone I told off for spamming unfriend me, ex-partner’s who I thought we were cool with unfriend me, an old friend who I gave thousands of dollars of business too unfriend me and many more!
It does make me question myself when someone unfriends me – and certainly, when I see that person again “in the real world” I take a very suspicious view of them. I know in some cases (one old friend), was in tears over being unfriended on Facebook. She was dealing with cancer at the time, put up some posts of her with no hair – and stack of “Friends” unfriended he (just purely horrible behaviour of course!).
What I find very illogical about this whole process is why we even care. Quite honestly, some people I considered myself close too once unfriending me was a bit distressful and here is the reality:
Caring about it is really silly!
The reality is that let’s say we have 1000 friends on Facebook, 100 really really like us – who cares if 1 or 2 unfriends us and hates us? I think although it does emotionally play on us, it’s really pointless in worrying about it in that:
1) It’s only 1 person: So what one person hates you and wants you dead? The point is that you will have 999 more friends.
2) Do you want to be friends with someone like that? If someone unfriends you, screw them! They can go to hell and we don’t want them.
3) It probably makes them look silly: I have made the mistake of “Unfriending” people before and it can make you look like the “Silly” one. So don’t – let them look like that bad people.
4) If everyone likes you, you are doing something wrong: Even Mother Theresa had people that hated her. So should you!
5) Tall Poppy is at work: You get unfriended way more as you succeed!
6) You know they hate you: It’s a bit silly, they have made is public that they hate you. Not very intelligent especially in the business space.
7) Move on and focus on the right people!
I did quite a bit of research on this topic and started really asking myself why “Unfriending” can be so mentally painful. It can bring up childhood isolation / friendless type of issues. The reality is that in the modern world, as we get more successful a lot of people will just start to hate us.
That is awesome! The more fans and critics we have the better we are.
My advice? Even if it’s someone who you really cared for once and was close too – don’t be phased if they unfriend you. It’s more than likely their problem and if anything they are just showing the world their true colours.
Love your work, don’t let it bug you and keep up the fine work awesome wonderful people!
Thank you from Edward Zia!