I won’t lie to you (as if I do ever). I have had many times in my life where I have felt truly alone, had no friends, no money, no relationship and the only person I had to talk to was God & Jesus Christ.
Maybe it’s my fault, maybe it’s not – but for whatever reason, it has happened to me plenty of times. I remember moving schools and never fitting in as a child, my friends falling out with me and leaving me in late teens, being injured in my “Government” days watching friends die, being washed up and recently having a fiance & new stepchild give me the “Dear John” treatment.
For me – I have had some very scary experiences of feeling totally alone which totally preyed on my eternal deep down fears of “Being Abandoned”.
With being recently left by my old partner and being “Forced Single” again – it’s really confronted me in many ways. Besides the torment of thinking “What did I do to deserve this?” and not having my potential wife & child to eat with anymore – it has stirred up many things inside me and got me thinking about how we all go through this in life.
Many friends and colleagues have been the same as me in either similar or different contexts. Someone close to us dies, someone leaves us – or even “Something Good” happens! We get that dream job / opportunity and leave to a brand new city to “Start Again” with no-one around us.
For me, tonight was a powerful night. I was invited to a “Knighting Ceremony” at the “Order of St. John’s” which is basically an order from the old Crusade Days which today is all about helping people and the like. I have always been a “Christian Do-Gooder” myself – usually quite to the opposition of people around me. My faith in this regard has at times been great, but also a burden (it was even part of the reason why I am single again now). I had a great night, met some great people, discovered more about the good they were doing and thought “F#!T it” – I am in and joined this great movement.
So in a few days, I will be a “Templar” of sorts and I know that part of my decision was not only to do good – but also part of me tired of being by my own and wanting too be part of someone with a similar view of the world & creed to myself. The more I kind of think about my big life changing decision tonight and the more I think about things in general – it’s got me reflecting on our deep down yearning to be part of something beyond ourselves.
With my 4Networking experience, being a “Temporary Family Guy” (which was great while it lasted) and now joining the St. Johns order – it’s got me reflecting in life on the importance in being part of a like-minded community. My life fell into a heap until I discovered the 4Networking community and came part of it – and for me being single later in life, “the order” came at a right time to appease my desire to help others & do something more for society.
My thinking and advice? If you are reading this article – I bet you have been alone at some point, or you are even alone now. It sucks, it’s wrong, it shouldn’t have happened to you, however it did! If you are, it’s time for you to explore the world, try new things and find the “Possible Place” where you can fit in and feel the fellowship & community you deserve.
Humans are social animals and no-one deserves to be alone forever with their being no better feeling that becoming part of a group that understands you. If you are “Alone” temporarily or worried about it – then my advice to you is look deep into yourself, enjoy it while it lasts and keep an open heart & mind to great things that come your way.
There are great things out there for all of us and society is a big place. Sometimes, we just need to get out of our comfort zones to find it…
Love your work, thank you for the read and good night from Edward “Templar” Zia!