Time Wasters: Are they Worse than Slimy Pick Pockets?

They are at least at a similar level?

This week, I have had some people really waste lots of my time for their own personal agenda.  Some of these people have been quite rude and selfish and focused simply on their own needs.

Since I have been visiting Networking Sessions and working ahead, I have found them to contain a great mix of people – including some people from Multi-Level-Marketers and rude people just using me for “Free Advice”.

Now don’t get me wrong, please don’t think I am being precious or anything like that – or rude just trying to take people’s money.  I really enjoy meeting new people, sharing what I know and socializing with other like-minded people.

What I am referring to are people who:

– Are rude, aggressive time wasters, that are either after what’s in your wallet or want to pump you for information and aren’t nice about it.

Last week or so, I met this “Very Nice Guy” who then called me on a late Friday asking to meet up in relation to a great “Cash Flow Business Opportunity”.  If you read my last blog, this person wouldn’t say exactly where they are from (although it looks like a very common MLM scheme that I bet you have heard about).

When I replied to this person, I simply asked them to explain what it’s about, so I can decide whether it’s me worth visiting so we don’t waste each others time.  When I did this, check out or emails below:

Ed’s Email to Clarify:

Hi [Disrespectful Time Waster],

Many thanks for that.  I can make 6PM Thursday, however I was thinking things through and I just wanted to find out a bit more about what you are talking about.

I am actually quite flat out with my own business and you mentioned this was another business opportunity? I am a bit wary of going there to waste your time, could you just let me know a bit more of what it is about? It would be great to catch up, however I don’t want you to waste your time in the case I am not a suitable target for what you are after.

Let me know & thanks.

Ed Zia

Disrespectful Time Wasters Reply:

Hey Edward,

Apologies it has taken a while to get back to you. It been pretty busy this week as I am sure your week has been too! I completely understand that you are busy with your business, in fact most of the people I work with either are flatout running their own business or have demanding corporate jobs.

I know that that was one of my concerns when I first saw this. What I found however is that what we are working on is very leveraged in terms of time so that ended up not really an issue for me anymore. All we do is help people create annuity style income, outside of their job or business so they have another income source. You can use that for what you like, some use it to bank role their existing business, some as a plan B income should their industry decline, whatever takes your fancy. Similar to someone who invests in property or shares to create an annuity income however we do it much faster through business. Most people, no matter how busy they are in their job or business usually have time to invest in property or shares. As I mentioned when I was on the phone, we are not looking for people with a lot of time, just looking for people with the right attitude. Its only going to be a quick coffee so we can get to know each other a bit better, we can both ask questions of each other and after that, if suitable I’ll step into some detail about the different partners we have on board and how that fits into the picture.

At the end of that, you can tell me whether you think you have an interest as to whether or not to pursue it any further, either way, it will be time well invested. I can see that there is a Gloria Jeans in the Ashfield Mall which would be easy to get to. Unless you have another suggestion, why don’t we meet there at 6pm for 30 min or so?

[Signed – Someone who has no respect for other people]

What really baked my Korean Noodles about this was that, over the phone I tried to ask, then over email I tried asking and this is the treatment I got.  In fact, I am fairly confident which Multi-Level-Marketing company this person comes from, as over 12 years ago – I got sucked into one of their seminars.

They actually train you to mislead people and not tell you the name of their company – so you can con them into a meeting, give them the fully cloud treatment and take their money!  “Positive Thinking” used by “Positive Thinkers” designed to get into your hip pocket! (and obviously empty it out).

Well, after thinking this through – I think it’s an extremely bad way of disrespecting someone.  There are only so many hours in the day, we have businesses, jobs and families to look after (let alone ourselves) and you get people going around town doing this to other people.

There are some really great people in this world, however there are some real “Slime-Balls” as well that just don’t care about other people at all. In fact, if someone steals 4 hours of your life by dragging you to a seminar unwittingly – you are not getting those 4 hours back.  How is that different to someone stealing $20 from your pocket? I have learnt when one get’s busy, every minute counts – so make sure these “Time Muggers” don’t get you!

I wish I learnt this one 20 years ago!

Wasting Time: It’s just so Addictive and Fun – Why Stop?

Wasting time is way more fun than working right?

I am soo busy.  Yet I am playing on Facebook.  I am soo busy. Yet, I am playing games.  I am soo busy.  Yet, I have time to talk rubbish at the office.  I am soo busy.  I am so just important. And the list goes on.

Lately, I have started to realize some of the lies I am indulging in.  As I am getting much busier, I realize that I must find a way of getting more done.

Now, I don’t mean that egotistically or being impatient with people, I more mean where “I myself” just waste time for no other reason.  I have been really looking over in “What I actually do” each day and working out what needs to be cut out so I can get more done of “What I actually want”.

So far, I have found that my biggest time wasters are:

– Worrying about things outside of my control.

– Eating junk foods that slow me down (albeit I rarely do that these days).

– Thinking “too much” about things, instead of just doing them.

– Over checking my emails.

– Talking “Too much” to other people at the office (although it’s much less than I used too).

There are probably more of these, but what I can tell you is just by fixing most of the above – it would give me much more time that I would believe.

Now I am asking myself, “Why on earth?” and I addicted to wasting time? Now, I am getting on the right track – I have these “Strange Urges” to go back into these old patterns.

In not just myself (but almost everyone I know) is that we all “Develop” these strange time wasting patterns, that don’t actually work in our better interests but give us a “Secondary Payoff” such as:

– The excitement of Drama (over-watching General Hospital or Dynasty).

– The ego inflation of importance (we are “So Busy” and “So Damn Important”).

– The fun of avoiding work (if I am talking to a work colleague, I don’t have to face my work problems).

– The pleasure of indulgence (getting drunk with friends is so much fun and because I am hung-over I don’t have to work as hard today).

It’s quite odd, even when I list these out “Logically” I know that myself and most people I know have been guilty of such “Time Suckers”.

Like many addictions, we all get a short-term payoff from them, but often face much larger (and not always instant) consequences. I am actually finding, just by cutting back on these “Time Suckers” I have more and more time available! Strangely enough, the time was always there but as I didn’t have the pressure – I never felt compelled to really look at what I do and access it.  But, old habits die hard (but they do die!).

I have to say though, Wasting Time is very addictive! I am glad I am finally “Getting over myself” and really starting to act in my own best interests.

Does Being “Positive” all the time drive you Nuts?

Respect My Authora-Tah!

Ignoring negative emotions is like ignoring someone knocking on the door, a cat crying outside or a 4 year old tugging at your Shirt to take them to McDonald’s.

The more you ignore what you are feeling (negatively), to me and many people I know – the louder it becomes.

It’s a bit like, when say you are busy studying in a quiet library and someone taps a pen on the desk, or say busy in your office – and someone plays some song that drives you nuts (Brittany Spears does it for me).  In fact, when I hear her going off – my “Positive Thinking” goes out the window for sure! No amount of “Positivity” can get me over the pain!

You ignore it, ignore it, then eventually you start to go nuts! In fact, the more you “Try” to ignore it, it almost seems the more powerful it becomes.  Then eventually you end up moving, turning down the radio or asking them *nicely* to turn it down.

One thing I have realized in my own life, is that I have been a real “Bottler” of emotions.  If something let’s say not quite fairly is being done to me, I have a real tendency to “Ignore It” because:

– I need to be “More Flexible”.

– I need to be “Nicer”.

– I need to be “More Accommodating”.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not saying we run around like “Control Freaks” and dictate to everyone what we want.  That is the other extreme of what I am saying which isn’t any better.  In fact, “Control Freaks” can often be the type of people that contribute to the problems that this blog post is attempting to resolve!  What I am suggesting as I have found (not only for myself but many others), if you are the type of person that tends to “Take Stuff” to the extreme – it isn’t very good for you.  Quite often, the stress you end up taking on can really show it’s ugly face in a wide range of ways including:

– Passive Aggression,

– Fatigue & General Loss of Energy,

– Bottling up & Exploding,

– And in extreme circumstances – can lead to serious physical issues (i.e. Anxiety, Depression, Heart Attacks etc).

One thing that has really come clear to me in my life lately, is that my own act of “Ignoring” bad stuff around me is actually causing me harm.  That is, besides not “Feeling Right” it can really leave you on edge and run you down over a period of time.  What I have learnt is that it’s really critical to acknowledge your so called “Negative Emotions” and take action on them.  It may be changing something in your outside world or even changing the way you look at things.

This is where too much Positive Thinking can get you into trouble.  If you are “too Positive” it can cause you to ignore all the “Negative Stuff” which leads to the above problems.  Like many things in life – a healthy balance of things are required.

Why is it so easy to get sucked into Buying Rubbish?

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Even though I have worked in Marketing for over a decade, it has taken me a while to become really “Aware” of all the Advertising & Marketing being thrown at us to get us to “Act” in a way that benefits a given company.

When I was getting my weight back in control, I really started to think about how hard it can be to effectively lose weight.  At almost every step in the supermarket, marketers and companies are busy pushing sugar-laden confectioneries, high calorie cereals – They even take a swipe at you on the way out, by putting those great “Impulse” chocolates in front of you!

Now, before you say “OK Ed, take some responsibility, you chose to eat those chocolates” I am the first one to agree with you.  However, you got to acknowledge – companies are throwing lots of money at us to get as to act in a favour that benefits them.

In fact, is this fair doing it to Children?  OK, you can blame me because I am an “Adult”, but the marketing directed at Children? Come on – you can’t just pin that on the kids.

One thing that has really got me thinking lately is that:

– If you don’t know what you want, you can (and most likely will) get sucked into things that aren’t to your better interests.

If anything, this makes perfectly logical sense.  If you know exactly what you want to do and why you are doing it – it’s actually very hard to get distracted.  But if you are “Going with the Flow” – I have found this can really work against us.  When I did this myself, I really got into Chocolate and got very fat!  Fortunately I lost most of it (But it wasn’t easy!).

There are so many people out there (such as in my confectionery example) who are spending hundreds of millions of dollars a year to get you to act in a way that suits them.

Scary Huh? Besides picking on Chocolate (which is a personal love of mine) – this can really apply to many areas of our life.  A good example (as my mother always reminded me), if you hang out with the wrong crowd, you can really up becoming the wrong crowd!

Even better (and especially relevant Post-Christmas) is Consumer Credit Card Debt.  Once you get sucked in to this arrangement (i.e. Easy Credit Payment Terms, Easy ability to withdraw etc) it can be a tough one to get out of! If you know what you want (and why), I have found it really protects you from getting sucked into other people’s plan. If you are sucked into something that doesn’t suit you, then I really ask you to be “Critical and Independent” and ensure you act in your own interests.  After all, who else is going to look after what’s important to you?